Shine on!

 

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Is what people are saying to you and how they are treating you getting you down? Is it making you feel less than? Does it make you second guess yourself?

I feel like we all have been there. I will admit it’s taken me a long time to understand it and be able to handle it.(most of the time) But I feel like at this point in my life I am getting it on a deeper level than I ever have. I have told my kids for a while now, “people are bullies because they don’t like something about themselves and/or are unhappy people”.  No person that is happy with themselves and feels loved would act that way or be mean to people. Sit and think about that one….it’s true right???

And I’m not just talking bullies, but also your average Joe(sister, brother, mother, friend, spouse, etc). Someone close to you that says things that are really hurtful. Listen to me carefully….IT’S NOT YOU!  People say and do all kinds of things because of their own insecurities. Do they need to feel better about themselves by judging you? Are they making things in your life seem less than because they doubt something in their own life and it’s only fair that your life sucks too? It could be a million reasons.

People are made of up of layers and layers of emotions and experiences. And many times that person has no idea how hurtful they are and when it comes down to it would never mean to hurt you.

You have to learn to be ok with yourself right here and now. We all have things we are not happy with when we self-evaluate, but if you focus on what you have to offer you can train your brain to celebrate YOU.

When I sit across a friend and we are having a conversation, I focus on what they have to offer from a friendship standpoint. I’m focusing on their soul and spirit along with how I can learn from it and take joy from it, not how big their arms are(just using that as a crazy example because I’ve actually heard females say that!), or they have too many wrinkles!(oh wait! that’s me!) When someone offers true friendship, that’s all we really tend to see-friendship.

See yourself through your best friend’s eyes. Surround yourself by people who love you. Love people back and then find the simple joy in lifting them up as well.

My point is please please find a way to learn to love yourself and focus on the amazing qualities you have, not lack of. I am continually learning this myself. Granted we have things to work on, no doubt, but learn to embrace your qualities, not only your faults, is key to happiness I truly believe.

Let your light shine! Let your beautiful light overflow out of your soul and shine on everyone around you. We are all a work in progress, no denying that. But remember, you have to love yourself first, then others will follow.

Let’s learn to love ourselves more as well as provide support to those around us. I am learning that love heals all. Let’s lift one another up! It really does a body good!

If you agree with this post, hit the like button. If you have something to add or disagree with I’d love to hear your comments.

Continue to follow your Faith, find Joy, and look around and focus more on your Blessings.

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Self-confidence…hmmm…

If you saw my last post, which I’m assuming you did because you’re an amazing and dedicated follower of my blog. hehe You saw I posted a selfie. A silly SnapChat selfie. My post also goes to Facebook land and when I went to look, BAM!, there was my face larger than life. Holy cow, I didn’t think my face was going to be the cover picture! Yikes! It was really hard not to cringe and hit delete!! It made my stomach turn and get super nervous. It was an uncomfortable feeling for sure. I kept asking myself if I was sure I wanted to do this. I felt like I just jumped off the high dive into the deep scary pool. Well, too late now, just go with it!

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I am on the mature side(can you tell I hate stating my age?! Remember if I don’t say it, it’s not happening) and didn’t grow up in this era of phones and selfies being so available. I grew up where you had to take 20 pictures and wait for your roll of film to be developed at the store and then hope and pray one of them turned out! Which in my case rarely happened. These kids have no idea how lucky they are to have the opportunity to re-take the picture immediately after they took it. Lucky ducks!

If you’re from my era(no digital cameras), I feel like being in front of a camera is not as easy as it is for kids now days. I mean by the time your child reaches 2 years old, they have already “smiled” for the camera a gazillion times! Pictures weren’t that big of deal like they are now, no Facebook, no Instagram, nothing!

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Now nothing can be done without a picture being taken and the memories being captured for forever(which can be good and bad ha!). Kids are so used to seeing their face on a screen, there’s an actual app that requires a picture to send the message! WHAT?!?

It has its benefits for sure, but also its downfalls. It’s funny that my daughter has taken enough photos to already know her “good side” in a photo. At times, after viewing the picture, I totally get it and tell her to switch me sides! I look better standing without my big forehead sticking out as much. But of course she won’t, so I try tilting my head a different way and changing my stance. lol! oh brother…

I’ve tried to just relax and realize my face nor my body is perfect and having something for my kids to remember me by is better than nothing. I find myself looking at pictures of others and always thinking how great they look. I love seeing their smile and joy through the picture and because of the social media, I get to keep up on their lives. Which I love! I have friends all over the country and rarely get to see them, so seeing photos of their families and them are such a blessing.

I don’t find myself picking them apart, criticizing every little detail. I find myself looking at the joy in the picture and enjoying the memories they are creating. I love seeing their expression and happiness in their eyes.

So why do I pick myself apart? Why do I hate to stand in front of the camera? I feel like I shouldn’t be too confident and look like I love myself too much. No one likes a person like that! I mean I literally have run behind people dodging the camera!

I once saw a t.v. clip about mothers and pictures. How not enough pictures are taken with the family. So all the memories your kids will look back on, they won’t even see their mom! One of the most important people of their lives. They’ll ask, “where was mom on this vacation?”! lol! Are you guilty of that? I know I am.

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Always the picture taker! 

I feel like this all comes back to self-love. Which for me is a constant challenge. How do we get insecure? How does that happen? Do we create it ourselves? Has someone done that to us?

I’m pretty sure it’s different for all people. We all have our story. Our skeletons, our demons. Our glory, our joys. I know for me, I’m working on loving the person looking back in the mirror. My husband tells me all the time how beautiful I am, but it really has to be felt in the soul. With a little more age and a little more wisdom, I’m slowly getting my groove and not being so critical of the face looking back at me.

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Wearing sunglasses always makes me feel better! Covers half my flaws! lol!

Loving ourselves is not always easy. It has to be a conscious choice. One made with determination. Some days are easier than others for sure. We all have our good hair days, right? lol!

My hope for you is you love yourself to the fullest. If you don’t, I pray that you are like me and working on it. We deserve it right? Right! And why not have self-confidence?! I want to love myself enough to be filled with joy. That’s all I’m after, is joy in my soul. And loving myself would make it so much easier.

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Most importantly, we are teaching our children, our daughters. Teach them to love themselves as you love yourself. If you’re like me, you let your daughter know how beautiful she is, tell yourself the same thing. See yourself through the eyes of your child, or your best friend…..beautiful. Declare it, speak it, believe it. It’s true. No one is perfect, why should you be?

~I will always have Faith that tomorrow will bring me more Joy and will I continue to relish in my blessings to get there.

 

Ok, I’ll admit it….

I have an addiction I realized this past weekend…..are you ready for it?? I have to admit I now have an addiction to face products!  Creams, oils, lotions, anything to help me look younger(or at least try!) and to moisturize my skin better.  There I said it! The blessing wrapped in this for my husband is, I buy most of my stuff at T.J.Maxx for a really great price! lol!

The problem is, I go into the store and there are so many great options I feel all excited and joyous each time I reach for a new one on the shelf! So many good ones,  I hate to put one back over the other because, if you’ve shopped at T.J.Maxx, you know if you don’t get it now, when you come back, poof! It’s gone. AND the best part is they are so darn inexpensive, it gives me even more joy when I see the price!

See, I have extraordinarily dry skin. Including my hair. I know, for those of you who have oily skin, are saying, “oh, poor you…blah blah blah”. But it is a pain! Kind of like when you have dry lips, only this is your whole face! I have dry crackly skin until moisturized. When I hop out of the shower, if I don’t moisturize within minutes, I’m feeling the cracking happening. Just imagine in the middle of August in the desert when the dirt is dry and there are cracking lines on the ground. blek! That’s what my face feels like half way through the day if I don’t use 10,000 products.

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Then in the winter I’m always feeling like my face is going to crack into pieces during the day. And with aging, it makes me look even older! I take 3 fish oil a day, try using a gentle exfoliate wash on my skin to get the dead skin cells off so I can start a fresh layer of products. I’ve tried everything but shooting oil through my veins! Which, if there were an option, I just might do it.

I have tried from the most expensive products to the least expensive. There are very few products I truly love and won’t live without. One I will not live without again is my Roden + Fields eye cream! But for the most part, I feel like I’m always changing and that includes my skin and hair. So one month something works great, and then I feel like at some point my body says, neh…I’m bored of this stuff, can I get another kind please?!

In the mornings I’m finding it takes me longer to put on my lotions and oils than my make-up! ha And I need a larger container for all my containers along with a lot more room on my bathroom counter. Yikes!!

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Yup, these are all in one sitting…

If you’re young you may or may not understand this. If you’re getting to be a more mature woman(sounds much better than older, right!!) you will understand my pain and may even be experiencing this crisis yourself. You know who you are. Right? I’m not alone…. please tell me I’m not alone.

And yes, I know some of you are screaming-DRINK MORE WATER. I hear you, and I really do try. Some days, I’m much better than others. Much like exercising. Some days I’m a champ and others days….not so much.

Do you have a closet addiction hiding in your bathroom? It’s harmless for sure. And who doesn’t need another reason to laugh at ourselves? Hey, it could be much worse right?!

Is there a male in your house hoarding products? Cologne, shaving cream, hair products?

Leave a comment and let me know what your harmless addiction is. I’d love to know I’m not alone.

And since I’m not getting any younger and I’ll never have perfect flawless skin, I’ll continue to use SnapChat! lol!

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I hope you continue to find Joy, lean on your Faith and find an abundance of Blessings among the cracks in the dirt.

 

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